Atheist and Theist Remember Goo

The Wild Boar (Sus scrofa) is the wild ancesto...

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Theist: Hi Atheist glad you could stop by. I wanted to ask you about Goo’s execution. Did you witness it? I heard he was screaming revenge to the end…the slimy little weasel. I could not stand that little liar. By the way Goo said this photo was taken of him when he evolved into a boar.

Atheist:  Yes that looks just like Goo. No I didn’t attend the execution but I heard all about it. It was not a pretty sight of course and Yeah he died a screaming angry coward. I think he could have least maintained his evolution view to the end without behaving like a loser. I will miss him.

Theist: I was told he vowed vengeance and uttered curses to his accusers. Kinda dumb to make threats you cannot carry out. He died as he lived a liar and a loser. His tales of Darwin were pretty far-fetched. I mean most folks know that Darwin was in some way demented to think man evolved from animals. Goo was always saying that evolution explains criminals. He should know since he was himself a criminal.

Atheist: I disagree. Goo was a devoted evolutionist to the end. He held fast to his beliefs that we indeed evolved from apes. He should have known; he was there. He was the ape, the kangaroo, the reptile, the tortoise, the lion, the tiger, the elephant, the baboon, the horse, the cow, the pig, the chicken, the egg, the shark, the gorilla, the whale the robin, the wild boar, the eag…

Theist: Yes I get the picture he was goo to you.

Atheist: He was goo to me and you. He was a sticky little gooey guy who washed up on that distant shore he called home to begin to evolve into everything that exists. To me, even though he is dead murdered by insane creationists, he will always be my hero.

Atheist lefts his glass in a toast to Goo. Theist rolls eyes..

Theist: Did Goo have any relatives? Were there any survivors? Was he married and did he have children?

Atheist: Funny you should ask because he always wanted to evolve into a human being. But he basically remained goo as he evolved into all that lives in the world.

Theist: How could he remain goo while evolving into all living creatures including human beings? Of course I believe none of this but still like to be entertained with the strangeness of it.

Atheist: Goo knew he had an important mission when he exploded out of the big bang billions of years ago. He landed on that distant shore right smack into the middle of the ocean. He often would reminisce about his adventures underwater. I remember he saying that the creatures who lived on the ocean floor had no eyes. Makes sense since why have eyes when you live in darkness. Goo was a genius. But when he lived int he sea, It seems he was the only goo there so it had to be him to flop out onto the shore that fateful day trillions of millenniums ago..

Theist: Look I know you liked Goo and admired his life. But let’s just call this what it is: Sentimental hogwash. Goo is dead and the world is better for it. The world can now move on without Goo’s lies and deceptions. His lies that there were  transitional fossils has been thoroughly refuted by science. His tall tale of his trials of sorts through the Cambrian and Precambrian period. I remember he saying that the Ice Age was his greatest adventure when he evolved into a penguin and other cool creatures..using his words. His lies of hiding in Darwin’s pocket while Darwin was studying his finds at Galapagos is unbelievable. His claim that the giant tortoises knew him on a first name basis. It is amazing that you could find this deceiver believable. Did you know that no one claimed his remains for burial? I was told his remains were cast into a deep slimy pit and covered up with weeds.

Atheist: Not true. His remains were burned and placed in an urn. They are now in the Smithsonian.

Theist: I guess I need to look that up.

Atheist: Look it up under science.

Theist: I think I will try fun and games in archaeology.


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