Posts Tagged ‘Liar’

The Reading of Goo’s Will and Last Testament

Piltdown Man

Image by jovike via Flickr

With all his friends gathered in the Museum of Un-natural Pseudo-history Goo’s grieving attorney Evolutionist arrives and is greeted by the waiting crowd. Hopping from his limo he waves away reporters, then hurries inside to do what he hates to do: read Goo’s will to his grieving followers the Darwinians.

There is a hush. After the soloist sings The Impossible Dream his attorney Evolutionist asks that a moment of silence be observed in memory of his friend. An infidel comes forward to say there will be no prayer since none there believe in God.

Goo’s will and last testament  is opened by his faithful attorney Evolutionist. Weeping loudly he reaches for his handkerchief and wipes his eyes. He begins:

I Goo, being of sound mind and goo, do hereby testify that I am forever innocent of all charges hurled against me by the Bible-thumping creationists. Obviously if you are hearing these words today my dear Darwinian friends then you know I am sooo…dead. Dead by the hands of religious fanatics who believe in God without evidence. I had evidence to present to the world. I know what really ruined it for me was when I came up with Pilt-Down man. And his girlfriend Lucy. Big mistake! This is what alerted the creationists to my wicked ways.  Truly I never thought the fundies would challenge me on this. Before I knew it there were literally thousands upon thousands of essays and reports calling me a liar. There were excavations and sites revisited to prove me wrong. Not to mention all the Christian books, movies, and personal appearances by the Creationists who were out to prove beyond any doubt that God is real.

I lost the great battle and the creationists still rule the world as they have since the dawn of time. Rather the dawn of their time. Or rather the dawn of the only recorded time. Anyway let it be known that from this day forward I will be dead and remembered as a liar without a conscience.

But to you my dear Darwinian friends I will always be Goo who dreamed the impossible dream..hoping that transitional fossils would be found even though they were not found. It cannot be denied that if evolution did take place; is taking place there would be so many transitional fossils the world could not hold them. Why after billions of years and something changing into something else there would have to be proof. But there isn’t. So yes I  had to lie I had to keep up the show.

But as you continue in life remember that I tried.

I bequeath all my worldly belongings, which belongings consist of  a spade  and a knapsack,  to the Smithsonian where also will lie my gooey remains after my hanging by the Creationists.

I bid you adieu. By the way I am in Hell.

The crowd cries loudly repeating over and over...My great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great- a billion greats… great-granddaddy is a baboon.


Goo’s Execution

The hanging of two participants in the Indian ...

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It happened that Goo (from a far distant shore that appeared from nothing out of the so-called Big Bang) was found guilty of lying to the world.

His false claim that the human race descended from him has been thoroughly refuted by science.

The judge sentenced him to death by hanging.

The following is a report of what happened at the execution:

Only a few people were present to witness Goo breathe his last. It is reported he chose as his last meal a hot roast beef sandwich with mashed potatoes and green beans. And a large slice of Red Velvet cake for dessert. He swallowed down a large beer, smiled and belched before in death he closed his lying eyes.

After Goo is finished eating and drinking and belching, he is dragged to the gallows. Screaming and resisting with all his gooey might, he vows revenge on his killers. “I will come back I swear I will rise from the dead and kill you hypocrites!

Finally subdued he offers no more resistance knowing his fate is sealed. He trembles with fear as he catches his first look at the hanging place called the gallows.

Prison warden: Goo do you have any final words before we hang you by your lying scrawny little neck?

Goo: Not really. All I had to say I said on the witness stand. I stand by what I said that it was from me that the human race descended. Man came from apes! I know that is hard to accept. But it is true. Man is an animal! As I said; it all began on a far off distant shore after I met dear kind Mr Darwin. I slid out of the the sea and…

Prison warden: Place the noose around Goo’s lying bony dirty smelly godless neck Mr Executioner.

The executioner comes  forward with a black hood over this head. Only his eyes are visible. He glares at Goo. He places the noose around Goo’s neck. He secures it as if it will somehow fall off as Goo begins again to resist..

Goo reaches  up to feel the noose. He winces… then immediately composes himself.

Goo: I hate you all! I hate you all! May I die rather than deny that man evolved from goo to reptile to monkey to grunting, smelly, disgusting sex-crazed, wild beas…

CLUNK! The foundation beneath Goo’s feet disappears. It drops like a pebble into the abyss never to be seen again. Goo flops like a rag doll as the noose does its work of strangling the last lying breath out of him. After Goo’s dead lying body dangles for a few minutes, the executioner removes Goo’s lying neck from the noose. He places his corpse on the waiting gurney.

He is pronounced soooo…dead by a archaeologist doctor. A great cheer erupts from the crowd of creationists. Not a tear not a sigh when lying Goo died.

Goo died as he lived;  a liar.

He is taken down and buried in a grave marked

Here lies a liar and a fool” Goo the decieved.

Your Enemy the Devil

Gustave Doré, Depiction of Satan, the antagoni...

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The Lord Jesus said…..”The thief comes not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” (John 10:10)

All we need to know about what the enemy wants to do in a life is found in what the Lord said about him.

steal; Definition:To takeandcarryaway, (Satan wants to take all you have anyway he can do it, it matters not to him how he does it. He will use even your own family and friends to viciously assault your life. He does it feloniously; totakewithoutrightorleave,andwithintenttokeep wrongfully; kill; Definition:theactofterminatingalife (Satan desires desperately to terminate your life, end it any way he can) and destroy? To ruin completely; spoil: Satan wants to RUIN you completely! Nothing left! His plan for you is total destruction. His only desire is to murder you.

To tear down or break up; demolish.

To do away with; put an end to:

To kill: destroy

To subdue or defeat completely; crush:

To render useless or ineffective: to utterly and without mercy DECIMATE!

This is what the devil desperately wants for you and your family and your friends and your stuff! Remember he has nothing else to do but plan and plot to how he can destroy you.

As Reverend Rod Parsley said once….All the devil wants to leave after his attack on you is a dirty greasy smear where your life used to be.”

You don’t think he exists? He has got you then!

One should look at one’s life and see if any of the meanings of these words; rob kill and destroy… are manifesting anywhere. If so then it is time as one preacher put make war on the floor!

(For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds; (2 Corinthians 10:4)

We have in the arsenal God gave us spiritual atomic bombs and if we are not using them it is not God’s fault. God wants to drop atomic bombs on Satan while he keeps us safe.

We have chemical weapons also in our Christian arsenal…when we began to pray the devil begins to inhale fumes that are toxic to his eyes and nostrils. Then his attacks on us and our family are destroyed. His plans and plots and tricks and traps and pits for us fail as we wage war on him ON OUR KNEES!

It is true that Satan trembles when he sees the weakest Christian on his knees!

When you kneel you humble yourself before your Creator!

Add FASTING and he is sent to Hell’s emergency room choking with a stroke and a heart attack where he is angry and defeated again.

The devil is real. He is not a figment of imagination. He hates and he kills.

He comes to rob you of everything you have; your peace, your health, your family, your finances and your life!

He is out to get you anyway he can. He uses the lie in destroying the ignorant and proud (Two dangerous ways to be) by fooling many that he does not exist.
That is a failing ploy of the devil for who in his right mind would believe that evil doesn’t exist? It exists it is here.. and is active in the world. Even if the enemy has succeeded in making some believe he does not exist he cannot make anyone in his right mind think that evil does not exist.

It is manifested daily such as murders, rapes, adultery, broken homes, destroyed lives and so on…drunkenness, and lying, revelings, lasciviousness, deceiving, pornography and sexual sin in any form… and Bible ignorance.

That evil and wickedness exist cannot be denied! Unless you live in denial wearing rose colored glasses thinking everything is beautiful in its own way!

If one is Bible ignorant then one is ignorant of reality and what is really going on.

Whoever denies that Satan exists cannot deny that evil exists.

And every time God is disobeyed it is manifested in the world, the flesh, and the devil.

The only desire Satan has for you is total destruction! He wants to kill you. He is planning right now how to do it. He watches you. He studies you. He makes himself familiar with your life. He acquaints himself with your likes and dislikes so he will know how to attack you. He stalks you. He has a map with your address on it. He knows where your children are.

He will use anyone and anything he can to destroy you. Make no mistake he is out to get you! He is working 24/7 and If he cannot destroy you he will try to discourage you. He will do all he can to make you look at your life and circumstances instead of at Jesus. He will lie to you telling you to hate and not to forgive others. He will deceive you into believing that you “are all that.”

He wants to use you to slander and judge others. He wants to use you as a champion back-biter and gossiper. He wants your tongue to be the altar he worships himself at. He wants you to sacrifice your family on the altar of lust and greed and selfishness.

He wants to use you as the poster child of stupidity in Hell. He wants to  personally pin the medal of stupid on you while he laughs..
The Christians who can discern can see the medal of stupid displayed on the chests of the hypocrite. Slandering others is one of the most dangerous games in town. It makes the slanderer a chip off the old block. The old block being Satan.

It also makes you an enemy of God. Want God to hate your tongue? Use it to lie. Want God to hate your heart? Let it devise wicked imaginations. Want God to hate your look? Let it be proud? Want God to hate your feet? Let them run swiftly to mischief. Want God to hate your hands? Let them shed innocent blood. (This is meant spiritually or physically) Want God to hate when you bear witness? Let it be false. Want God to hate you? Sow discord among brethren.

Proverbs 6:16-19 says that God hates these seven things.  What we think or believe changes nothing. Might as well tell it as it is.

Jesus said of them that they profess to know God but in works deny him. They claim to love others but they have two faces one smiles at you, and the other frowns and slanders you.

Satan wants to deceive you into condemning others for doing what you yourself do! He is a sly trickster and he is way slier than you will ever hope to be as he slithers in and out using the ungodly to ruin and hurt others.

He is that old serpent the devil. He is the dragon. He is the accuser of the brethren. He is the mastermind behind every destructive word or act.

He is the reason for every broken home every broken heart and every broken life.

What did the Lord say we can do without Jesus? Nothing!

The devil doesn’t concern himself with the Bible ignorant (he has them) unless he sees them look to God. He will do all he can to nip that look to God in the bud; Viciously he is after the children of God.

Why is there a devil? He is a fallen angel who wanted to be like God. Not like Christians want to be like God; loving kind and true and forgiving who do not slander others and judge and condemn and gossip. He wanted to usurp God’s authority. He wanted to be God!

God said Satan is the accuser of the brethren. In Revelation 12:10 Satan is said to be “the accuser of our brethren.” The word “accuse” is defined, to charge with, or declare to have committed a crime, to find at fault; to blame . .
He accuses others and he uses the hypocrite tongue to do it. He uses human tongues to slander and destroy reputations and characters of people. He is without mercy!
Does he have a tongue? yes he uses human tongues. He has many forms but his most popular and favored is the human form. Many Bible ignorant fallen from grace hypocrites available to do his bidding.

The apostle Paul said they professed themselves to be wise and became fools.

He wants desperately one thing for us; he wants to murder us. The Bible says if we hate our brother we are a killer; a murderer. Then John the apostle added to that verse…“And we know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him.” If you are slandering and backbiting and spreading gossip you are a murderer. God said this not me.

Once he was an angel lovely and powerful, then he decided that that was not enough he wanted to be more than what God made him to be.

Somehow evil made its way into the universe when this once beautiful angel decided “I will be like the Most High.”

God said he was perfect in all his ways until the day iniquity was found in him. God found it. Nothing is lost or hid from God.  God determined iniquity to be in that one angel. When he said he wanted to be like the Most High; this was the sin the iniquity that had to be must be punished forever.  He was cast out of heaven as lightning forever to be no more an angel but the devil.

“I” was and is the devil’s problem. It is all about him. …..he thinks he is all that.

He thinks he is the one who deserves to be more than what he is.

However the devil doesn’t think such as you or I think….We  will do this or that….his mind if he has one is evil so nothing can come from it but evil.  How to destroy you. He cannot be reasoned with. He offers no negotiations except as a deception to get your attention before he wipes you out.

If one doesn’t have the armor of God on one will be utterly destroyed by Satan and his minions. Put on the armor of God today.

God answers prayer! It is a guarantee!

God bless you today!